Navigating the journey of loss can be tough. Therefore, it is important to understand the experience of grief to guide yourself through recovery.
Although grief is a universal human experience, it is also intensely personal and individual to each person. Whether it be the death of a loved one, the end of a relationship, or the loss of a job, grief is a natural reaction to loss. The process of grieving is not linear; rather, it is a complicated and dynamic one that incorporates a wide range of feelings, thoughts, and physical sensations. With that being said, it is possible to find comfort and rekindle hope.
In the past, works by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross and other specialists in the field have been studied, broadly accepted, and applied into our understanding of the process of grief. However, Ted Rynearson, a clinical psychiatrist, expressed “There are really only two stages of grief. Who you were before and who you are after,” begging the question, are there five stages of grief? Is there a specific way your grief must be present?
Process of Grief
Even though there are no particular stages for grief, many people find it beneficial to be aware of a few typical feelings they may experience. According to psychiatrist Elisabeth Kübler-Ross’ original theory, there are five stages that make up the grief process. To understand Kübler-Ross’ theory better, here are the stages and some example phrases for each stage:
- Denial: “This can’t be happening.”
- Anger: “Why is this happening? What did I do to deserve this? Who is to blame?”
- Bargaining: “If only I ____, then I could have prevented this.”
- Depression: “I’m too sad to do anything.”
- Acceptance: “I’m at peace with what happened. I will move forward.”
Keep in mind that each person’s grieving process is different and there is no right way to grieve. These stages might appear in different ways for different people. Some people instantly start grieving while others take time for the loss to set in. It is also important to note that physical sensations may also occur. These include fatigue, nausea, lowered immunity, weight loss or weight gain, aches and pains, and insomnia. Understand that the emotions and symptoms you feel are normal.
Coping with Loss
When battling loss, it is important to find healthy ways to cope with the grief. Here are some ways that can support your healing journey:
- Allow yourself to grieve: Allow yourself to go through any range of feelings that come with a loss. The healing process might be hindered by repressing or avoiding emotions. Instead, look for comforting surroundings and people who support you.
- Seek support: Interact with loved ones, close friends, or support groups that can relate to your situation. Consider getting professional assistance if you notice that you can no longer manage your everyday activities. Trained therapists can offer assistance catered to your particular situation and suggest useful techniques for regulating your emotions.
- Practice self-care: Your physical and emotional health can suffer as a result of grieving. Therefore, set aside time each day for self-care activities that will help you heal, such as exercising, eating healthy, getting adequate sleep, and deep breathing.
- Express your feelings: Find constructive ways to release your emotions. This could involve journaling, playing sports, or attending support meetings.
- Honor your loved one’s memory: Think of honorable ways to pay respect to and remember your loved one. This can be making a memory box, keeping something of theirs, or taking part in a charity event or cause that meant a great deal to them.
- Set realistic expectations: Healing takes time and there is no “right” or “wrong” timeline for grief. Allow the process to develop naturally and practice patience with yourself.
- Practice positive coping strategies: Even while your grief might never fully go away, you can adjust to your loss through time and find joy again. You can enhance healing by taking part in activities that make you feel comfortable and fulfilled.
Conclusion
Grief involves a journey that puts our mental strength to the test. Be kind to yourself and give the healing process time to progress at its own pace as you navigate loss. Ask for help from family members and professionals, take care of yourself, and cherish your loved one. In the midst of the grief, you can find healing and hope through time, support, and self-care. Remember you are not alone, and good times are right around the corner.
References
The Pennsylvania State University. (n.d.). Ted Rynearson, M.D. . Speaking Grief. https://speakinggrief.org/experts/ted-rynearson#:~:text=There%20are%20really%20only%20two,something%20we%20carry%20forward%20forever.&text=Grief%20rarely%20involves%20clinical%20consultation
Rogers, K. (2023, May 15). What the 5 stages of grief are, and how to get through them. CNN. https://www.cnn.com/2021/09/12/health/five-stages-of-grief-kubler-ross-meaning-wellness/index.html
Smith, M. (2023, June 20). Coping with Grief and Loss. HelpGuide.org. https://www.helpguide.org/articles/grief/coping-with-grief-and-loss.htm